| Why can't I be more outgoing? |
[Jun. 22nd, 2007|03:50 pm] |
I wish I had more to post. Sadly, half of what's going on in my life is dreadfully dull, and the other half is stuff that is filled with intrigue and drama that just posting a smidgen if it will spawn off a dozen psychodramatic tornadoes. Just know I am okay, but dealing with a lot, and my stomach hurts.
I have to say, spending time with some of my friends is an incredible experience. ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) anyarm, for instance, is one of my several friends who just incites adventure and unusual situations. Many of my old McLean friends used to say they dragged me along places because usual things happened around me; I was like a weirdness magnet. anyarm is similar, but she has the added bonus of having no qualms whatsoever in talking to perfect strangers. I am not talking about not being afraid to have a conversation, I mean she will initiate conversations, which was my one failure as a salesperson. "I love your blouse," she said to a random lady in Starbucks. "Where did you get it?" The woman responded, and so anyarm said, "Let's go find it." So we did. On the way, she asked another woman about her purse, and another woman about her pants.
Shopping with her is very unique. We did find the blouse, and some other clothes as well, whereupon anyarm got stuck in a formal gown she was trying on for her upcoming cruise. "Help!" she cried out in laughter. It was like Winnie the Pooh getting stuck in Rabbit's front door. The zipper had jammed, and she couldn't slip out of it until the salesgirl went into the dressing room and offered to cut her out. anyarm eventually escaped by tearing around the broken zipper (I think).
Some people may have found such an event embarrassing, but anyarm laughs it off. This is perhaps one of the keys in happiness, I think, which is not taking yourself so seriously. Lessons I should learn. As a kid, I took myself very seriously. As an adult, I try not to, but I don't seem to take enough social risks unless I am in the right mood. I couldn't go up to someone and say, "That's a nice hat," except in fandom, where people need this kind of encouragement in funny hats.
My fear of social rejection is still stuck back in school. Bugger. |
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| Comments: |
Too stupid today to write much, but thinking of you and hoping the meds will work out. You deserve to be happy and free from fear.
Most of my fantek friends only started really noticing me after I got a bit more outgoing. At least to the semi-noisy level I am now. :)
I used to be that way too. So afraid of making a fool out of myself.
Then... I turned 40 and my attitude changed. My motto now- 'I don't give
a rats ass what anyone thinks about me.' I am just going to be me. If someone doesn't like it or makes fun of me, that's their problem. Just like
if I don't like what someone said or did, it's my problem.
You'll get over it Punky. If you can't laugh at yourself then you have no right to laugh at anyone else. Sure I get embarrassed at times but I don't
beat myself up over it anymore. 'Oh well'. | |
