punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,

Punkie's Blog: For Girls!

Ugh... I overate. I haven't been eating a lot recently, with all the stress and sickness and all. I felt better tonight, so I ate my usual portions and ... bluuh. I have to get my mind on something else.

When I started to gain my "pack of friends" in high school, there would have been a 4 in 5 chance you were a girl. While I can rattle off a plethora of female names of people I hung out with, I can only name a few boys, and only a few of them did I know very well (Jason, Mark, Steve, and Neal). My best friend was even a girl. I just got along with them better.

Hanging out with a girl was much more fun. My friends were a fairly science fiction and intellectual lot who, if they even owned a purse, it would usually be hand-made and would always have some ratty paperback stuffed into it along with some Kotex, pens, but rarely any makeup. I could have conversations with those girls, and they regarded me as a neutral force that they could trust with some secrets about boys that I would say saved me a lot of embarrassment in the future. While I am sure this didn't help my appearance that I was probably gay, I still would repeat this choice of friends if I had to live it all over again.

To this day I still think I have more female friends than male, but it's more 60/40.

As I got older after high school, however, I began to realize that maybe some of the things these girls told me might not have been exactly true, and could have reflected more about how they wanted to look to their friends rather than their true thoughts. While I was accepted as a group participant, I didn't have many opportunities when a single girl would sit with me and tell me about problems she was dealing with (except when drunk, and often I was a snot rag who nodded). The impression that I was left was that girls didn't really like sex except as more of a curiosity, but this could have been because none of my friends wanted to "come off as a slut" (this was the 80s, in an upscale neighborhood). I recall one friend in particular who admitted openly she liked to masturbate, and I was shocked when other girls considered that "disgusting." I asked one girl who actually stopped being friends with my friend what she considered so disgusting. She said, "Girls don't DO that, they don't NEED to, and any girl who does is messed up in the head. Masturbation is a guy thing." For years, I thought this was true, until I started reading on the Internet. Now I think that girl had some repression issues.

I might be effeminate, but I still think from a male perspective. My "feeling" for years was that guys generally NEED sex and girls just tolerate it, if anything, because the sex they were getting was so bad. I'd usually hear something like this:

Guy (to other guys): Yeah, it was great. First, she was all over me. Then we made out in the van, and she screamed and trashed until she had a mind-blowing orgasm that left her gasping for air.

Girl (to other girls): Ugh, okay, he was so drunk. He started grabbing my tits, so I thought, "Okay, he'll stop soon." But he didn't. Then we were in the back seat of the van, but he had whiskey dick and after a while, he farted, laughed, and passed out on top of me. Gross!

I now think girls like sex as much as guys, but as Larry Miller once said, "If girls knew what we thought, they'd never stop slapping us. The difference between our urges is the difference between shooting a bullet and throwing it."

So let me ask my female readers some questions about their lives from say, age 14 to 17:

1. Where you interested in boys romantically/sexually?
2. Did you ever admit that openly to a group of friends?
3. Did you desire actual sexual relations to the point it altered your intellectual method of thinking? (i.e. get distracted because you were horny?)
4. Did you ever seek out sexual contact, and did you ever take serious and perhaps regrettable risks because of this seeking?
5. Did you think other girls in your group who did so were sluts?

I'm curious, and you can be anonymous if you want.
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