punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,

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I really hate vinegar

One of my weird dietary issues is vinegar. I can't stand it. It tastes like my mouth does after I vomit, and apparently nobody else has this reaction. It's very tang is so repulsive to me, I get a gag reflex if I have too much of it in a bite. It has such a negative reaction with me, I actually get ANGRY if it shows up unexpectedly in some food I put in my mouth. Like I have to calm my temper and everything.

Recently, I had some Lebanese takeout food because I was hungry and takayla is friends with the wife of the owner. I had lamb with rice, which I like when I go to Afghan restaurants. I had 5 small pieces of lamb in a bed of rice, which would have been okay, but the rice was laced with enough sour vinegar to make it unpalatable. So I tried their bread with yogurt dipping sauce. The yogurt dipping sauce also had vinegar in it, which might explain why it looked curdled. So I tried some of the greens, and it was positively drenched in ... eeeeugh! Luckily, it was take out, so my angry ranting and paranoia about using vinegar to perhaps disguise potentially spoiled food was heard by no one but my flaky RHCE study computers.

Maybe I am a soft American. When I think Italian food, I think tomato sauce, pasta, pizza, canolis, and so on. About 10-15 years ago, weird restaurants started to pop up, like "Olive Garden," and "Macaroni Grill." These were part of a "new breed of Italian cooking." I would say at least half of the crap they serve is soaked in vinegar. Your salads are limp with it, your food is tinted with it, and they serve almost everything either luke warm or cold. When I enter an Olive Garden, for instance, the whole place reeks of vinegar. I mean, I can stand the smell, and you do get used to it, but it has this mixture of sour vomit, wine, and salty bread odor that, mixed with the faux brickwork, paints the picture in my mind of a drunken man passed out in the gutter in a puddle of his own sick, after having soiled his clothing. Literally, that was my first thought when I walked into one of those places about 8 years ago.

No one else has this reaction. They shovel their cold pasta salads, dripping with purulent sewer stench, like it was heaven on Earth. I feel like the only one in the cult who knows that's not food they have been hypnotized to eat, or maybe they are pod people and it's only a matter of time before I am one of them. Then again, most people like raisins, too. I find them foul little things.

Yes, I do realize sushi has rice vinegar in it. But apparently not enough for me to notice, which is fine. I don't have an academic issue with vinegar, unless I can taste it, then I loose my little mind.

Thanks for letting me rant.
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