In other, less depressing news, I got Pippi back up and running. She's got a second IDE board, RAID 5, Fedora Core 3, KDE 3.4, and noticeable speed improvements due to an error I had made when I first got the system about 2 years ago. See, I got this "new Intel fast-boot" board, which claimed faster booting time, but I found it was anything but. In fact, it was the SLOWEST board I had that wasn't pre-Pentium. Since it was a Linux box, I thought, "well, I will only reboot it 3-4 times a year, I can live with that." Because of physical moves, diagnostics, tests, and other reasons, I rebooted it a lot more than that. It was annoying that the BIOS would just sit there for about a minute before going to the OS.
Heh. It turns out, I had the wrong jumper setting on a hard drive. The BIOS must have taken a while before resorting to some default, because once I fixed it, the boot time was mere seconds from power-up to OS handling.