punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,

Melting Pot sucks

A few days ago, we went to the Melting Pot Restaurant, a pricey fondue place that's hidden - and I mean hidden REAL good - in some office complexes in Reston. I had heard about it because takayla, anyarm, and fuzzywhuze and how great it was.

Well, I didn't like it. There were many issues as to why, and I realize some of them are my fault, but some of them were not.

First off, never go there fat. It's not going to work. All their tables are pretty much bolted in place (due to them being table/hotplate combos), and 90% of the place are booths. Their clientele, from what I saw, were mostly post-sorority girls of such a thin build, I could scoop about 2-3 of them under each arm like cord wood. Giggly, loud, big-eyed waifs who get drunk and chatty off one glass of wine. So I guess it makes sense to have the tables and chairs bolted so close together. Everyone in our group (which included the people listed above, plus my son and my sister-in-law Debbie) were of the more rotund end of the human scale, and I was pressed so tight to the table, I literally had an asthma attack because my lungs could not expand far enough. anyarm became claustrophobic, apologizing because she did ask for a table in some room where they had chairs. The first "6 person booth" they put us in were two quarter circle booths separated in the middle by a low wall, which was unacceptable. So then they put us in a "straight booth," which would be considered "seating for 4" in a normal restaurant. CR and Debbie had to sit on chairs at the end. was pressed so tightly against the wall, my shoulders could not spin properly in their sockets, and my range of mobility in my arms was so limited, and I don't say this lightly, I have had more room sitting in coach seating on a domestic airline.

The waiters were nice and helpful, so I can't complain there.

The food was okay. It was good, but I have had better for a lot less. I realized that eating that much cheese is a bad idea (so greasy, bleah), and I found the whole process annoying, because the main meal you had to cook your food, two pieces at a time, and wait for 2-4 minutes, depending on the meat and whether you cooked with the broth or oil. Half the stuff fell off of everyone's forks. This might explain why the portions were so small, because any bigger, and we would have been there way past closing time. Plus, I couldn't eat very much because I was pressed so close to the table. I probably ate half a meal's worth of food, but didn't leave hungry because I was so squished.

I was so miserable after the experience, and I am not going back. For $58/head, I wanted a LOT better. Christ, I spent less at the Luxor Steak House, and ordered the Fillet Mignon!
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