It all started because I wanted coffee and ramen. Separately. I started the coffee machine with my last few scoops of Kona blend, and started my ramen.
That's when I saw no one let Ahfu out of his crate (he's crate-trained). He was not pleased. I let him out, and then the cranky neighbors had let their dog out, a cute, lop-eared shepherd mix, and Ahfu went nuts. That made Widget go nuts. I had to chase and corral them both in my sock feet with sharp rocks in my yard (due to the deck building).
That's when I got back, and my ramen was done. There was a lot of hissing I guessed was it boiling over onto the stove. But no... the coffee maker exploded. Literally. Apparently in the 5 minutes I was outside corralling the dogs. I don't know how, I don't even know why. No, not the fragile glass pot, the mechanism somehow. I came to the kitchen and there was coffee everywhere. The hissing was the coffee that had gotten over my cooking ramen on the stove and the hotplate on the coffee maker. I turned both off immediately because the smell of burnt coffee grounds was horrible. Very little coffee got into the actual coffee pot, but the grounds had gotten into the coffee. Grounds were also all over the floor, walls, sink, and backsplash in about a 1 meter radius from the machine itself. I am scratching my brain trying to figure out just HOW a simple mechanism like that would explode. It's like a toaster exploding; what parts of a toaster are under pressure? I think it it completely broken, because a large piece of a plastic part (the one that holds the filter and swings back), is sitting in my sink. Fuck. I liked that coffee maker.
Then, while wiping up all the boiling hot water and coffee grounds from everywhere, I got paged. At work, we have a "BIG INTERNAL SERVER" (BIS), and it paged down. Down hard, as in off, unreachable by anyone or anything. BIS is the internal server that keeps everything going; tickets, databases, customer records, and so on. It's on older hardware, one of the last "FreeBSD" boxes resisting our corporate, "The previous admins were angst-ridden geeks, FreeBSD is their legacy, and FreeBSD MUST DIE!!!" I am one of the ONLY two people who have a CLUE how FreeBSD works, and I fear it's untimely demise, and we have plans to get it on Linux, but we are short on man-hours, so we just hope it survives until we can get to it. BIS is kind of like the San Andreas Fault to people in San Francisco; you know it's a problem, you have half-heartedly made disaster plans about it, but in reality, in the back of your mind you know "the Big One" could happen at any time, and it will be a horrible, horrible mess. So when I got paged, this made my stomach sink to the floor.
My work laptop took forever to boot up. It has some nasty Spyware (some IE thing called "SysProtect" where if I launch IE, it tries to get me to download some Anti-Virus program, and insists popup after popup, slowing my laptop to a crawl) on it, and I have tried everything to get it off. Recently, Lavasoft's Ad-Aware detected it after a full scan, but when I removed it, not the windows boot process takes five minutes. In the meantime, I prayed the BIS would come back up, that is was just a network blip, but as the minutes went by, and my laptop hard drive light whirred away, it looked bleak. Finally, my desktop was loaded, and my VPN connected to the office network.
That's when the doorbell rang, like it was tripped by me logging into my work. Ahfu, still cranky, went ballistic. He ran to the door and tried to attack it. Widget freaked out, and started howling and yapping. All I saw was the top of some head swaying back and forth. I figured it was a package. No, it was Orkin. I won't go into my whole spat with Orkin, but suffice to say the crux of my issues with them are the guy who comes out is an alcoholic. I have called them about it after he dove over my curb and parked that way, and then stumbled up my stairs, and they said they were aware of the problem, and he was on probation, and they gave me 2 months free. And the last two visits was another guy, but this time... Mr. Drunk was back. He looked terrible. He slurred his speech, and while he wasn't looking drunk, he looked worn out, and spoke in low tones while Ahfu attacked my leg to get to him. I couldn't hear him with all the barking. There's more to the story, but this is long, and I fear I'll lose what I write because....
Meanwhile, my laptop has downloaded a Windows update and every 3 minutes, asks me if it can reboot. The default button is "Reboot Now," and I fear it will come up while I am typing, and think, "He hit any key. He must want to reboot." Yes, this has happened to me. Yes, more than once.
FireFox downloaded an update, and wants restarted, too.
Someone you may have wondered, "Hey, didn't he have ramen cooking?" No, now I have some kind of maggot-colored, coffee-flavored gruel burping in its pasty pot.
I have to reboot now. The BIS turned out to be a false alarm: the database admin was doing some work, crashed the database, and had to restore and reboot the box. I have no idea why he did this on a Saturday and didn't warn me beforehand. Later, while trying to get SysProtect out of my system (again), it crashed the laptop at winlogon.exe (repeatedly) because the Spyware is evil, and I hate them.