punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,

Shitty tech manuals

I have found that “RTFM” also means, “I don’t know, you figure it out.” In this vein, I have been told, in so many words, RTFM by a company where I did RTFM, and just couldn’t figure out TFM.

Without being too technical, this is what I’d expect to hear if this company was a fireman.

You: [from burning building window] HELP!
Them: What exactly do you need help for?
You: Getting out of the building!
Them: And how did the building catch fire?
You: I don’t know. Rescue me!
Them: Do you know the history of fire?
You: I don’t care! help!
Them: You can’t be helped until you understand the context of your current situation.
You: I know the situation! The building is on fire, and I need a way out!
Them: Stating the obvious will not help. Now, think for a minute what fire actually is...
You: It burns, creates smoke! Help!
Them: Yes... but why does it burn, it needs fuel, right?
You: Why can’t you get the ladder out and rescue me?
Them: I need your help understanding the fire. Now, where did it begin?
You: This isn’t helping!
Them: I can’t do everything for you.
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