punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,
punkwalrus
punkwalrus

Thisby sucks

So, Thisby, the almost feral crazy cat we have? Spends days under the bed? Well, her curiosity combined with fear are her major undoing. I mean, she is extremely scared of everything and will bite hard if handled. I have never had a cat so feral in my house in my life. I am glad she uses the cat box, but other than that, she's just an occupant.

Sadly, sometimes her curiosity leads her to wander outside the bed space, and due to her lack of socialization, always ends up doing something stupid. When she was a kitten, she hid the the freezer coils of a deep freezer. It was about the space of a softball, and had the freezer been running, she might have died there. One day she found out that the pool table legs were hollow, and decided to live there. It took her over a year to get scared out of there. She hollowed out spaces in our furniture down there at the time, and used a former loveseat as a littler box. :(

She got trapped in my den once. She hides in almost impossible spaces, and the only hint you have that she's there is you'll smell and find where she's pooping eventually. She managed to crawl into a computer, which was on and running, and got her fur tangled in the fans of the video card and CPU. I only found her because the machine kept overheating and I took the box apart to see if the fans were running. She was wedged in between the PCI cards like a snake. It was only her dehydrated nature and the fact her fur was wound in the fans that she didn't run away or attack me. I had no idea how she got in there, but I had to cut her out.

So she did the same thing in my new den. She must have wandered in when I had the door open to move stuff in and out. And a few days ago, I found poop on the afghan on the couch. Dammit! But I didn't think of Thisby at the moment until while checking e-mail last night, I saw a poofy tail slink into the tartan plaid couch. Yes, she had hollowed it out and was living in there. WTF, you stupid cat?? There's no food, no water, and the heat is terrible.

So I spent half an hour smacking furniture and extracting her from various hiding places like cushions, drawers, packing crates, and small spaces between things where only a snake could have found. And I had the door open so she'd have an obvious escape route back to the bedroom, and she'd run out towards the door, make a U-Turn, and run back in the den. It was like getting a raccoon out of an overfilled garage. She was terrified, of course, so she pissed all over everything, including herself.

Somehow, but the grace of Bastet, I managed to catch her in mid-leap in such a way I had her back haunches. She roared and snarled, whipping her head back and forth to get a hold of me, but I had managed a grip in such a way I had her whole back end. She's really only slightly larger than a kitten, even at age 7; she looks bigger because of the poofy hair. She couldn't whip her head around to bite me, although she tried. "Click click" went her jaws like an angry pair of razor-sharp pliers. She emptied her bladder all over my hands. I figured it was only a matter of seconds before she squirmed her way free and tore off a majority of my arm with her razor-sharp claws and teeth, so I carried her like a steaming hot loaf of bread to the bedroom and laid her down next to bed, in hopes she'd run right under. But instead she ran away to another part of the room.

Quickly I ran back to my den and put the door back (I don't have a hinged door yet; the old broken held in place by friction with the frame and some duct tape). I stayed in my den for a while, pissed off, pissed on, and feeling like I had just been in a real fight of man versus nature. My asthma kicked in, and had to mediate slowly to get back some air and stop my beating heart.

Anyone want a cute but feral small poofy Siamese-ish cat? You'll never know she's there. She doesn't get along with other cats, but doesn't start fights. She's kind towards older fat and sedentary male cats. Might be a great cat for a single owner, single cat household. If I could catch her, I'd give her to you...
Tags: cat, thisby
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