punkwalrus (punkwalrus) wrote,

Mana, huh? Doo doo dee doo doo...

Originally uploaded by punkwalrus
So, the other day, I got into this promotion to try out a new drink called "Mana." Mana Energy Potion is the premium energy shot made by gamers for gamers, they said. It's for long nights of gaming, partying, and the longer mornings that follow. It has lots of vitamins, no sugar, and no aftercrash.

Okay. Why not. I got a 4-pack for around $4 (free + $3.90 shipping). This was better than their normal going price, which is $20.10 for a 4-pack with shipping, but it was a promo only because I am the type of guy who actually registers his NVidia cards. That was weeks ago, and I finally got it. They shipped it via DHL, which is only slightly better than any delivery service featured in Benny Hill sketches. DHL crammed this box into my mailbox because the 2 yards to my front door must have confused the flatlanders they hire. The bottles they featured on the web site look like they might be nice pear-shaped bottles, possibly like those they used to sell "Orangina" in.

Take a look at what came in that photo up there. "Oh, but surely, Punkie, bottle shape means little." True, true... but that doesn't give you the full picture.

Let me show you to scale.

Mana in perspective

That's a quarter. Let me show you the big picture:

Mana is overpriced

Forty. Milliliters.

Only 20 calories, though. Woo! It's fat free, too. Only 2.5 carbs. I bet. Maybe it's "super-concentrated." So I tried some, and the first thing I thought was that I had sucked down some very old and moldy sour candy that had been lying in my mom's purse since the last presidential administration. It tastes a lot like the drinks "Red Bull" or "Whoop-ass" or "Motrin Children's Liquid Aspirin." Suffice to say that they don't show the bottle to scale, although they do actually state in the "About page..." a little further down... it's 40 ml and sour. It is an energy shot, not an energy drink, they say. Although taste is pretty subjective, our circle of geeks (us included) LOVES the flavor. It has a sour bite that makes you feel like you definately [SIC] got a dose of energy.

Always read the fine print.

It gave me no energy. I went to sleep at a reasonable time, and felt no effects other than the scars on the inside of my cheeks from the initial shock pucker.

Do not... buy this. Unless you are a fool and his money, and then you'll soon be parted anyway. But I am glad I lost $4 to this, and not $20.

Tags: drink, mana, soda
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